Dr: I’ve got very bad news. You’ve got Cancer and Alzheimer’s.
Patient: Well, at least I don’t have Cancer.
The doctor told me that he would have me on my feet in 2 weeks. He did. I had to sell my car to pay his bill.
Patient: Someone decided to graffiti my house last night.
Dr: So why are you telling me this?
Patient: Because I can’t read the writing. Was it you?
Dr: How’s that little girl doing that swallowed the 10 quarters?
Nurse: No change yet!